Back to the way I was? No. I will never be back to the way I was before I broke my wrist. Everything has changed. I have changed. My arm is in a constant state of change and healing and swelling and inflammation and stiffness. My arm is also 100% healed. I've just not reached that day yet. This will be a long row to hoe. But I'm looking forward to it. I started physical therapy this week as the cast came off on Monday, 37 days after putting it on. It came off without incident and although my orthopedic surgeon, Dr. Ira Esformis, said "When I take the cast off you will have pain and you will beg me to put the cast back on", that was not the case.
Immediately after breaking my wrist, I applied three things; Reiki, my conscious-healing intention, and ice. I almost passed out before leaving for the hospital but managed to control my breathing by putting my head in between my legs. I went into shock a little bit but not as much as when the possibility of surgery came up. The on-call orthopedic surgeon declared to me after looking at my x-rays "we will set your arm, follow up with an orthopedic surgeon this week, you'll probably have to have surgery." This would also not be the case.
I have had enough surgery to last me a lifetime. I absolutely did not want to have pins and plates put into my wrist if I could help it. But at this point, what could I do?
I called my father. Whenever something major happens to me and I need serious help, I call my Dad. This was serious enough and apparently he thought so too and called a good Dr. friend who left his Saturday nite dinner plate to come set my arm in the nick of time!
A man appeared in the doorway smiling at me. He said "I'm Dr. Esformis". I was instantly relieved. The hospital staff kept stopping by and peeking in to see who got the Doctor in on a Saturday nite, and to see who was getting this favored treatment. Well, humbly, it was me and I was ever so thankful. Within two hours, my arm was set and I was back home safe and sound. BTW, Hackensack University is probably one of the finest medical institutions in the Garden State if not the country.
I thanked him repeatedly for leaving his dinner to tend to my bones and accidental absent-mindedness. Having to say that "...I stepped on a skateboard" was all too irresponsible for someone who claims to be living consciously. I was embarrased but Dr. Ira just laughed and said "Don't be ridiculous! It happens".
It does happen, mostly when we're not paying attention.
I explained to Dr. Ira that I am a Reiki Master Practitioner and I had been applying Reiki and also speaking against surgery in my heart and mind. Well, besides loving Reiki and wanting to come for one of my sessions, Dr. Ira and I agreed that my arm would be set and I would not need surgery. He agreed with my thinking...right there in the emergency room...he got what I was saying. I said "Until you tell me otherwise, I am speaking health over my wrist, and no complications. I will not need surgery. You'll see"!
What I didn't know is that most fractures are followed up in this country with surgery, and in some cases, unnecessary surgery due to the shameful financially driven medical industry. I was speaking against that ferocious, insatiable lion from the moment I walked in there.
After Novocaine was injected into my wrist and started to take effect, Dr. Ira began to set my arm. He wrapped gauze around my fingers and hung my arm counter balanced over an IV pole. Then he applied some weight to my bicep. Not much, just enough to give my wrist bones a little wiggle room. Then, he used his hands, applied some pressure and POP! It went back into place. It felt right, it sounded right and I was truly convinced, no surgery for me.
Back to x-ray, lo and behold, Dr. Ira, with a huge grin on his face exclaimed "so far, so good"! No surgery then and two weeks later after a follow up visit and another x-ray...no surgery. Although the bone collapsed slightly in the very beginning of the healing process, it stabilized and is healing very nicely, as bones can heal.
Did I have pain while in the cast? Absolutely! Luckily, Reiki energy goes right through casts and I applied it constantly and liberally. The pain became quite manageable and now, my arm is mostly sore as I gingerly begin my rehab.
Two weeks prior to the cast coming off, and immediately after Dr. Ira said I would have pain, I started to convince myself I would NOT have pain when the cast came off...and I didn't. At all. I'm sure that his comment was based on years of experience, but I am not your average human. I aspire to be better and to pay closer attention to the language we use when thinking about ourselves and our circumstances. I could've easily given into that line of thinking...surgery - check, pain - check, not getting full range of motion back - check. But hell no.
Why, if given a choice would I settle for negative, wreaking havoc kind of thinking when I alone have the power to continue to heal myself?
I am whole. I am healed. I am fully restored.
...oh, and I'm willing to do whatever it takes to achieve that.
Who can stop me?
So, here's to Summer . . .
PS i've undergone hand surgery so ... more pics, less typing ...